Come to the edge

During a counselling session, my client and I had the unfortunate experience of a pigeon dropping down my chimney.  The noise was sufficient for us to assume it was mischief of rats.  As we sat opposite each other in our disbelief and horror, we also found the humour in our shared experience. 

I coaxed the pigeon out.  I cleared the exit, talked to it, left a trail of biscuit crumbs, and finally cut the escape hole bigger for it to find its own flight to freedom.  Over many, too many days, pigeon and I built up a relationship.  I talked gently to it, encouraging it to find its way to the hole and take flight.  It was important to achieve a good outcome for both pigeon and I.    

This story is relevant to share as through its arrival, I identified the metaphor in this visit.  Pigeons are symbolic of flight, fertility, and freedom.  In my own life I had already began to feel the need to move and grow some more.   I received words of encouragement and coaxing yet was unable to respond with sufficient resourcefulness to find “flight.”  The “hole” created for my own freedom had grown organically and was sufficient for me to pass gracefully through it.  For a time, I remained happy maintaining  the status quo; resting for a while whilst I figured out my best move.  

I am reminded by the poem by Christopher Logue:

A poem about taking a leap and having faith that the landing will be a safe one.  A leap of faith is far from a spontaneous reaction.  Dithering and hesitation. Fear and edging forward, peering over the precipice, and retreating back.  Backwards and forwards, forwards and back.   The dark murky waters of uncertainty.  A pool full of our own pressure to arrive at a decision and a need to push forward into flight.  Even a considered leap has some regret later.   Or to reject the entire flight and stay stuck in the status quo, again with much remorse.    

Pay attention to this reflexive process.  Reflexivity is achieved through a systematic method of heuristics (Moustakas, 2001:309).  Heuristics involved a search of self, flowing out of inner awareness. The primary task is to recognise and become aware of whatever exists in the consciousness and unconscious until an essential insight is achieved.  What is this leap all about?

The immersion gives energy to this question, to explore every possibility and scenario until all ideas surface. The leap occupies the mind; to consciously and unconsciously prepare oneself to undertake the task. It takes time and is not the spontaneous “he pushed, and they flew” scenario.  Overwhelm will settle to allow growth to take place from this inner unspoken dimension (Moustakas, 1990:28), until one becomes open and receptive to any unspoken knowledge that surfaces. Incubation and immersion break through to conscious awareness (Moustakas, 1990:29) with new insights.  And this illumination is the moment where clarity and enlightenment are attained and themes, qualities and components emerge into the conscious. 

Explication required an effort to understand what had awakened.  This was achieved through focussing and indwelling with concentrated attention to discover the texture of the phenomenon (Moustakas, 1990:31).  Once one becomes familiar with this data, creative synthesis made sense of it as a whole to be able to provide a decision forward, a solution. Creative synthesis required the tacit dimension of self-searching and intuition, arising from a period of solitude, focussing or meditation (Moustakas, 1990:32).  

Maintain your status quo, there is no need to push forward. 

What would be a leap for you? What process do you work through?

Do you make rash, quick decisions that you may regret?

Do you take time to decide and regret the missed opportunity? 

What symbols arrive in your life that if attention were given to them, could be therapeutic?  To explore symbols, look at Jung, or delve into the amazing Book of Symbols (Taschen).

And for those of you who like fortune cards, choose two of wands, the magician, and the tower.

Counselling is a similar process to Moustakas’ heuristics; a way of reaching the deep through a dialogic and safe relationship; resurfacing and looking at the texture of the phenomena without judgement.

Next time, shall we look at the moment when the hand is on your back and you are ready, or not ready to leap?  What does that really feel like?

1 Comment

  1. Nicky says:

    Having taken the time to read this properly – at this precise time – it is so timely and poignant for me as I enter a new stage of my life for personal growth. I have experienced making decisions after long deliberation as well as acting impulsively – both can bring regrets. I am learning to be patient and trust the universe, that life can shift unexpectedly and that each decision, choice and experience has led me to where I am now – on the edge waiting to fly…
    My symbols are words – a conversation with a stranger, a song, a poem, a blog entry…
    Thank you Kathy


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